The Long and Winding Road




The long and winding road……………….. (Beatles 1970). I remember this song from quite a few years back when I think I was about 15 or 16 and I always thought to myself what a boring and unlively song it was and never bothered to listen to the full song. Little did I know then about the road of life. I guess when I think of it now boy does it make sense, funny isn’t it how life changes?? Back then I thought the road of life was like the autobahn 10 lanes all leading in the same direction and going at one heck of a speed, but guess what I was wrong not even close. It seems like the road starts off wide and fast but soon narrows down to a little two lane country road, some people moving in your direction and some in the opposite, the problem is when life was on the autobahn the road was pretty much flat, straight and in good condition. Come to think of it pretty much predictable, however as it narrows down certain aspects of it changes, gradual hills become steeper and steeper and with that goes the dips, they become lower and lower, the potholes are sometimes small and if you lucky you can skim over them without much damage to the car but then some are a little deeper and wider. When you hit these you can feel the impact on the car, what do you do when this happens ??? Do you slow down? Common sense tells me this would be the best thing to do, but I don’t I just keep the petrol down (I guess I think I am still on the autobahn) and yep you guessed it a few km’s up the road you hit a bigger pothole. This time with more severe consequences, this time you not only feel the impact on the car but there is some serious damage to it as well. Oh Cr…….p you say to your self why did I just not slow down??? Each time this happens there is always a recovery period. The pace flag comes out and all on the road have to keep to a certain speed limit and no overtaking, funny though when the flags out you all of a sudden see a little more clearly!!! After a while you think Hey all is well the car seems to be handling well!! Great lets see if we can go a little faster ……… yep all is feeling good a little faster…….. and yes you guessed it, no not a pothole, but a sharp 90 degree bend pops out of nowhere and bam you’re off the road “farming” ……….Cr…….p I did it again. Yep that little voice inside your head is now saying I told you so.
As you guys all know the past few Km’s of road have had their fare share of potholes, 90 degree bends and hey some times there was even No tar!! As for the cars, I think it has taken it’s toll on them, there are quite a few on the road you know little ones, medium ones and big ones. I guess (I guess a lot in this letter) the road has a sort of ripple effect you hit the pothole and the passengers feel it as well, everybody on the N2 feels it. I know I have felt it and maybe the passengers pretend not to feel but they do. Then you get to thinking, who are the ones keeping the cars on the road?? Somehow we always tend to forget them, aren’t they the real hero’s?? Well who are they you might ask …. Well in my opinion they are the mechanics, always there to see where they can fix a shock here and change the oil filter there. What would you do without theses guys and girls?? That’s right you would be sitting on the side of the road stuck, more than likely with a cell phone that has no signal, Cr……p. Why did I not pay more attention to the car and getting it serviced, and maybe chat to the mechanic once in a while. I am sure he would have valuable information to tell you, but hey the lanes are getting narrower and more cars are joining the onramp, sorry, got to get on the two lane road before it gets to busy.

I guess (yes I know I use that word a lot) if I would choose to be a car I think I would like to be a M3 BMW; sleek and fast looking with all the bells and whistles, like traction control ABS brakes and so on, but I would also like to have the brut raw appeal of a 427 cobra. So which one would be the better to be BMW or Cobra and that’s where the mind comes into play. What is more important good handling, nice leather interior or brut raw V8 sound with a even scarier ride no traction control, no ABS brakes?? Well I would have to say for me it would be the cobra why you ask?? Well let’s have a look at the long and winding road. If you have an M3, yep it will make your drive safer and more enjoyable but the problem is you fall into that groove, you become used to the bells and whistles, and you know what, when you have to drive the Cobra and you will have too sometime or another you are going to battle. Why? Because this car relies on you as a person and not on the bells and whistles of the car, you have to hold onto that steering wheel, you have to hold onto the gear shift and boy oh boy you better know what gear you need to be in or else …………….yep Baaammm you’re into that pothole or the 90 degree bend farming with that little old voice laughing at you once again .

Well I am sure you have guessed it already, the cars on the road are us and the passengers are our family, wives, husbands, sisters and brothers and of cause our precious children and they are all part of the support structure, when you think of it ,it is great to have them but in the above little story we do take advantage of them and sometimes don’t give credit where credit is due. Well I can’t speak for you guys, but for me I know I don’t give my awesome wife enough credit in fact I am rather rude and abrupt to her at times especially these last couple of months. We are only human I hear you say, and we have these emotions I suppose this is true but we can make that effort to be a little more thankful a little more accommodating and a little more loving ,well that’s my perspective at least ,so I would like to take this opportunity to say a big thanks to all of you for enduring the last few Km’s with me and as a family we have all played our part ,yes maybe we could have done it better or differently but we pulled through and that’s what counts in the end .To Mel and Debs …Wow what do you say to you guys??? I am so pleased in my heart that you could look after Mom , I think she would have been so proud of you both ,I sure am and just say thank you for what you did I can’t say I know how it feels but I think I have a little of that feeling ,Debs you sitting up at night with Mom wondering about her and I am sure about where your life is going Mel for all the long hours you put in at your work and then still helping Debs ,I say words are not enough to explain how dedicated you were and how great it was for Mom to pass away with you with here ,Wayne you stay just to far to pop through and come to visit on a regular basis but you made the effort and that is what counts, things may not be great for you and your family at this stage but I am a firm believer that you are where you are now in life for a reason ,it is trying to find out why you are there that is the hard part Mom would have appreciated all the effort you put in as Mel and Debs have said on numerous occasions family was the most important thing to Mom and seeing her grand kids which she got to see a lot of at the end of her life was great ,for me I would like to say thanks to my wife she has lost out with regards to the new little one as my mind has been pre occupied with work and all the other things that have been happening, and I have not been the most understanding person, but she has stood by me and she is just totally awesome to me thanks Niks ,well I kind of feel like a young lion that has been kicked out of the pride as he needs to challenge a full grown male Lion to have a pride of his own ,when Dad died I still felt I had a connection to him through Mom ,now that she is not with us I find myself out in the middle of the bushveld,wondering????????????????????????? Just like that male lion, I am however standing not in fear but in faith as I know I have a good service team behind me it may not be visible but it is out there and that is reassuring ,thanks to all of you ,you all have a special place in my heart from this day forward I wish you all the best life has to offer and lets look back at Mom and Dad and take joy in the good times we had with them and learn from the mistakes they made I know I have learnt a lot from them and am grateful for that.



PS!! Don’t give that little voice a chance to laugh at you, be sensible and when your body and mind tell you to slow down you are going to fast …slow down


Thanks for everything

paranoid 22

It’s In Your Blood

It’s in your blood! What’s your interpretation of this saying?? For many I guess this could be a life changing statement, with half our nation infected with HIV the saying is well suited to our country. But thankfully for the following read it’s not going to be that bad. If you take a look at this statement though it is used so often during conversation, and I guess in the different text and conversation the meaning would be different. How true is this saying and where did it come from? Well I know it’s true and I am about to prove it but where it came from I am really not sure. I have done some research on the net but could not find rock solid evidence as to whom and when this saying originated. This saying reminds me of my Mom and Dad, dad especially it was often said during conversation with my parents.

During the past month I had the opportunity to have a ride in a Nissan 350Z “Drifting style” around the super tight Swartkops track. The driver (unfortunately it was not me) was no other than the famous “Gary Formato” and boy oh boy was this awesome. I enjoyed every second of it from the sound of the spinning wheels to the smoke filled cab and to the pure adrenalin that was pumping through my veins, and at the end, that’s when the above saying popped into my head “Bradley this is in your blood”

I don’t think you can describe to a person the kind of feeling that you experience during this kind of experience unless that person has the same passion for your interest. As a little boy I was very spoilt I think, so I had the opportunity to have motor bikes both on and off road, go- karts the list is endless, and during my childhood years there was always some kind of involvement in motor sport. So I go again to the “It’s in your blood”, I do believe this is true, having been out of this motor sport world for quite some time. My dad was the main connection to that world, I started to realize that I am still very passionate about cars, bikes and boats especially if they look good go fast and sound even better. Although my budget and time constraints do not allow me to fully enjoy this interest, there are still many motor sport thing’s that make my heart pound and get the adrenalin pumping.

Something that I often have to have a laugh at is Nicki I would be working in the garden or sitting having a cuppa when I suddenly hear it?? What is it? I jump up and run to the drive way but unfortunately it has already passed “did you see it” I shout to Niks you can guess here reply and reaction, she didn’t even hear it!! This is the thing I am talking about, what I heard was an AC Cobra coming up our street, I straight away recognized the sound of the Big V8 I could also hear he had his “foot Down”. To Niks she was most probably still having Dean’s baby talk ringing in hear ears totally unaware of the AC coming up the road, and this is what I am talking about. Your whole being is in tune with this interest, and when exposed to it you get this feeling that is indescribable to any one else. I remember as a little guy when the Wesbank Modifieds were running on TV, my Dad would be working in the garage and I would have to let him know when the next race was due. I remember the look in his eyes and the passion in his voice when watching those races, it is the same feeling that I now get as I have grown older.

I now realize that when I gave blood a few months back and they never called me back for more donations, it was that they found something extraordinary in my blood. I guess all the pathologist were a bit puzzled, but had they given me a call, I would have been able to explain it to them in two ticks “Motorsport” it’s in my blood check for it!! Just be careful I am sure it is in the levels that are deemed to be extremely dangerous.


Motorsport is the one thing that is in my blood this is obviously not the same for every one reading this but the big question is …..

DO YOU KNOW WHAT’S IN YOUR BLOOD??

Trapped and labled

You sitting at the desk, palms are getting increasingly sweaty, your heart is beating faster than normal, you feel the veins in your head pounding as the blood is flowing faster and faster through them, then it happens………………..Ok Bradley your turn I stand up walk to the front of the room and proceed to present “So just what is a SMC Report” I check to see that all is in order the lighting is correct the visuals is setup best for the trainees the flip chart is in the right place and then face the girls and guys and start, the first 2 minutes are hectic but soon you fall in line and before you know it the “1 minute left card” is up and you need to wrap up the presentation there we go !! Done, you take up your seat and wait for the response from the trainees. Well that went well the response’s were good and you feel to yourself you did good Bradley, the session carries on with another presenter presenting there topic, once all done everyone is having a laugh about how difficult it was to present to your work colleagues, there are 10 of us all together each person is throwing in there own remark and chatting away, then it happens the thought is there I want to tell it to everyone but it wont come out ,damm it Bradley open your mouth add your bit !!!!! go on go on …………………..and then the topic changes and it is too late, TRAPPED…………..

Darn Paranoid22 Let me out why won’t you just let me out!! This carries on for the two days of training and then slowly lets up as things go back to normal. There has been research recently on Patients that were supposedly “Brain Dead” and what it showed was that if the brain was stimulated, although there was no bodily responses there was a response from the brain of this patient how this was done I am not exactly sure but with today’s technology I am sure it could be possible can you image this you trapped and there is absolutely no way to let someone know? I don’t think I can relate to that extent but I think I could relate to a certain degree ,being quite is some times the most frustrating thing that you personality can dish out to you ,the first thing is people start to “Label” you he’s weird ,he’s so quite, I don’t think he has any confidence the list go’s on and on why do people do this to a person ?and in some cases they don’t even know you or they have heard about you from a family member or colleague and boom they off judging you left right and centre , I tell you it’s not a walk in the park being the “quiet” one I think this letter kind of ties up with my previous one “Take a Look through my eyes” maybe I put a lot of people on the spot with this dare to share newsletter and I guess we all have our own “issues” for lack of a better word but damm people are far to quick to judge a person in this world we live in especially if you are quite.

Why do people do this ?? I am not sure maybe it’s the conditioning from a small child the way your parents always talked about people ,maybe it’s the way people are gauged in this world we live in so often you are judged by the car you drive where you live what position you hold, what your education is? Somehow I don’t think we will ever get away from this but ,I sure know in my mind that I need to make a change and not just talk the talk but walk the walk as I to jump on the band wagon to add my bit when it comes to judging. The problem is you are sometimes judged from a young age and a lot of the times you are relying on teachers and any body older than and so called “wiser” to take care of your kids and to uplift them and not judge and run them down but that is where the mistake lies when you become a parent in my eye’s you are the person that needs to look after and care and nurture this child not someone that you think has the ability’s or personality or the education God gave parents the knowledge to know what is right and wrong for your kids’ but no body uses it or very little at that ,and when you see someone treating your children in a nasty or judging way do you stand up for them oh yes you most certainly do ,but so often it is the people that we expect to “Do” the right thing when it comes to treating our children that



don’t. When a child is treated this way he or she may not be mature enough to understand why this is happening to them and it has a huge impact on the way they see the world an the people in it ,and so this warped sense of people starts getting created ,I remember this clearly from school teachers referring to

me as “The quite one over there” or what’s wrong with you , you never participate “ never once did they come up and say “and aren’t you going to give it a try young man” or say something a little more encouraging and this not only goes for school teachers but for family and friends as well. Just when you entrust you child to the one you think is going to do the right think ….well you guessed it they turn out not to be the correct ones to have chosen.

This can have a big impact on your life into the future as not many adults take the time to think just what impact did I have on that child when I made him cry, or when I ran him down ,and then the famous words “ I was only kidding” no pun intended when they are questioned what a load of hog wash “ I was only kidding” they were not ,this is sometime’s done on purpose and again what real impact did it have on the child.

Well time goes on and these issues stick with you ask me I know to this day people still refer to me as the quite one and there is no problem with that as I am the quite one but they also associate all the other things with that and are completely wrong about me ,so my question is this? when that inner person wants to come out in a small child let it it may be a little shy at first but encourage it and soon with enough motivation it will and it will shine don’t shut the door on it as this only makes it worse and worse as time goes by and by then the labeling has started.

Paranoid22